I recently saw a conversational aside talking about driving in a city that I’ve visited a number of times and it got me thinking.
In another life I was an outside sales rep with a 13 state territory. In addition I would occasionally be sent to places outside my territory if there was a need. I used to work regularly in Boston, New York City, Long Island, New Jersey, Philadelphia, Washington DC, Richmond, Atlanta, Louisville, Lexington, Buffalo, Cincinnati, Cleveland, Indianapolis, Chicago, Milwaukee, Pittsburgh and Morgantown WV, and Toronto. On an ad hoc basis I also was sent to Memphis, L.A., Honolulu, and Seattle. With the exception of Boston and the ad hoc cities where I rented cars when necessary, I drove to all the rest of those places.
In my opinion, most of the places that are notorious for being difficult to drive in, aren’t. Boston is congested, but it’s not rough. The same for New York. The only borough I didn’t drive in was Staten Island. I found that even in Manhattan people aren’t nearly as aggressive as we often hear.
I found Pittsburgh a challenge, but only because it’s very difficult to turn around if you make a wrong turn. But that’s more about terrain than anything else.
L.A. was no big deal and neither was Atlanta. Both could be congested as well, but with reasonable traffic I never found any real craziness.
In my opinion, the two worst places to drive were Ohio and Indiana. Indianapolis is a slow driving city. I think it has to do with so many people not being sure what time zone they’re in.
And somehow people in Ohio seem to have been bred with some sort of pathological aversion to speed. Couple this with Yield signs on the bottom of on ramps and you have a recipe for disaster. I just go nuts when I have to drive through there. But if you're reading this and you're an Ohio resident I’m begging you- speed it up a little, will you? It’ll be OK, I promise.
The best and fastest driving that I used to see was in Chicago. If the traffic was moving, it was moving at 75 to 80 MPH. 4 or 5 lanes of traffic with half a car length between cars and everyone flying… man it’s great. And it works.
The other place is Detroit. We generally drive pretty fast here, and it seems to work pretty well too. I’m of the opinion that if you aren’t willing to take a life to shave two minutes off your travel time then get off the road.
On a more serious note, I really do think that if you're so scared when you drive that you refuse to stay with the traffic then you really shouldn’t be driving. If you can’t stay with the traffic stay out of the left lane. Don’t slow down to change lanes. It’s a good rule of thumb that the brake will get you into more trouble than the gas will.
What about you? What have you seen when you drive? Where do you fit in? What places do you just not want to drive in?
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Dilbert, Saturday, February 23
Have you been reading Dilbert lately?
Today's strip totally killed me. In my opinion it's one of the best punchlines ever written in the history of mankind.
If you're not familiar with the premise of the strip, check out the link to the Dilbert Blog on the right. It's basically the artists take on a real story about a guy in Iowa who lost his job for posting a Dilbert strip on an office bulletin board comparing managers to drunken lemurs.
EDIT: Here's the link: http://www.dilbert.com/comics/dilbert/archive/dilbert-20080223.html
I just love today's joke. That's going up in my office.
Today's strip totally killed me. In my opinion it's one of the best punchlines ever written in the history of mankind.
If you're not familiar with the premise of the strip, check out the link to the Dilbert Blog on the right. It's basically the artists take on a real story about a guy in Iowa who lost his job for posting a Dilbert strip on an office bulletin board comparing managers to drunken lemurs.
EDIT: Here's the link: http://www.dilbert.com/comics/dilbert/archive/dilbert-20080223.html
I just love today's joke. That's going up in my office.
Do long absences make the heart grow fonder?
It’s been a while since I’ve had the time or, frankly, the inclination to post anything original.
Oh, it’s not that I’m getting bored with the Jorge Experience., quite the contrary. For the last week or so we’ve been dealing with the flu at Casa de Jorge. The thing that really annoys me about the whole thing is that all the humans in the house had flu shots this year. It does seem however, that our symptoms were much less severe than my mother-in-laws, (she got it from us) who was not inoculated this year.
Here’s what happened.
On Saturday Mona had a massage scheduled for 11:30 with some massage therapist in Plymouth. For those of you not familiar with the area it’s a 20 to 30 minute drive from our house.
Sort of on the spur of the moment she also decided to get her legs waxed. She doesn’t shave them, and it was several months since the last waxing. Her legs were just as hairy as mine, but lucky for her she’s got light hair and you don’t really notice. Plus she never exposes her legs during the winter. Ever. And she only rarely does in the summer for that matter. It’s my fault really, I knew she was a hippie when I married her. One day I’m going to follow through on my threat to stop shaving my face until she starts shaving her legs.
Anyway, she took off around 10 am. I hung out with The Peanut, straightened up the house, did the dishes and started working through the laundry. I got some lunch into The Peanut and put her down for a nap and continued my chores.
Around quarter to 2:00 Mona called and asked if I’d had lunch yet. Hell yes I did. I was a little annoyed that I hadn’t gotten a status update before then. She called when she was a half a mile from the house. And she was calling to tell me that she had scheduled a hair cut for 3:00. That kind of pissed me off.
I knew that she wanted the massage, and had no problem with it. But now she’s having a day of beauty and I’m stuck at home doing the housework. By the time she would get home it would be dinner time and then we’d have to put The Peanut to bed, which means that we’re home for the night.
I knew (and so did Mona) that I was going to spend a good chunk of Sunday studying for 2 tests in my anatomy class, which was going to blow Sunday. That basically shot my weekend in the ass. Shit.
So Mona went to bed around 8 or 9 as usual. I stayed up till 11 or so. Then around 3 or 4 I hear her calling me. She’s in the bathroom throwing up. There was nothing I could do, but she claims she feels better with me in there. Crazy, I know. So there I am, standing behind her, turning on the exhaust fan and handing her the occasional Kleenex.
By morning it’s apparent that she’s sick. So I’m in charge again. She stayed in bed until 11. Her mom was supposed to come over in the morning and take The Peanut overnight. The next day was Presidents Day and the daycare was closed for a Teacher Development Day. Mom agreed to keep The Peanut on Monday so that both of us could go to work.
Morning turned out to be 2 in the afternoon. By this time I was getting pretty frustrated. I really needed to get some study time in. My plan had been to leave in the morning and head somewhere quiet. With Mona out of action there was no way I could study and leave The Peanut to her own devices. So now most of the day was shot in the ass.
Mom was 30 minutes overdue (not counting the 2 or 3 hours that had passed since “morning”) and I couldn’t find the phone with the caller ID to call and ask “WTF?” Mona, you see, is incapable of putting any object a) back where she found it or b) in the same place twice. And since she was sick she wasn’t getting up to join in the search. I was so pissed that I couldn’t find the “page” button on the base to get the phone beeping. I about lost it at that point. The missing phone was the last straw. Mom showed up just as I located the phone and all I could do was glower and grumble. Mom noticed I was pissed (not like it wasn’t obvious) and was offended. She was sure it was all about her. I didn’t care. After she left I told Mona why I was pissed (somewhat harshly) and went to Borders to study. But I was so pissed I knew that wasn’t going to happen so I just browsed for half an hour.
By then the guilt had set in and I went home and apologized. After a nice long talk I headed out again. This time I ended up at a nearby Caribou Coffee. I went there because they were the only coffee house I could find that sold Diet Coke. I don’t drink coffee. There were several people in there studying or staring intently at their laptops. I figured I’d be able to work with little distraction, but was soon proven wrong. Just as I got my self organized it seemed like quite time was over. More people came in, some to meet with the studiers, and began to have quite conversations AT THE TOP OF THEIR LUNGS.
So I packed up my stuff and went next door to Au Bon Pain. I spent about an hour and a half to two hours there when Mona called asking about dinner. So I packed my stuff and went to the grocery store (I had asked her to email me a shopping list).
Later that night I started to get sick. I worked a half day on Monday then went home, took a nap and went to school. I did fine on the first test as near as I can guess. Tuesday I pretty much just phoned in and the rest of the week wasn’t too much different. Wednesday was the low point, but I made it to school for that evenings test and again, think I did OK.
I guess I started to feel better by yesterday. The Peanut seems to have recovered and so does Mona. My mother-in-law was so sick by Tuesday that she told Mona at one point she considered calling an Ambulance. She didn’t, and her physician has given her an official diagnosis of the flu, so she’s been off work most of the week.
There’s still lots more drama, but that’s the gist of things.
How’ve you been?
Oh, it’s not that I’m getting bored with the Jorge Experience., quite the contrary. For the last week or so we’ve been dealing with the flu at Casa de Jorge. The thing that really annoys me about the whole thing is that all the humans in the house had flu shots this year. It does seem however, that our symptoms were much less severe than my mother-in-laws, (she got it from us) who was not inoculated this year.
Here’s what happened.
On Saturday Mona had a massage scheduled for 11:30 with some massage therapist in Plymouth. For those of you not familiar with the area it’s a 20 to 30 minute drive from our house.
Sort of on the spur of the moment she also decided to get her legs waxed. She doesn’t shave them, and it was several months since the last waxing. Her legs were just as hairy as mine, but lucky for her she’s got light hair and you don’t really notice. Plus she never exposes her legs during the winter. Ever. And she only rarely does in the summer for that matter. It’s my fault really, I knew she was a hippie when I married her. One day I’m going to follow through on my threat to stop shaving my face until she starts shaving her legs.
Anyway, she took off around 10 am. I hung out with The Peanut, straightened up the house, did the dishes and started working through the laundry. I got some lunch into The Peanut and put her down for a nap and continued my chores.
Around quarter to 2:00 Mona called and asked if I’d had lunch yet. Hell yes I did. I was a little annoyed that I hadn’t gotten a status update before then. She called when she was a half a mile from the house. And she was calling to tell me that she had scheduled a hair cut for 3:00. That kind of pissed me off.
I knew that she wanted the massage, and had no problem with it. But now she’s having a day of beauty and I’m stuck at home doing the housework. By the time she would get home it would be dinner time and then we’d have to put The Peanut to bed, which means that we’re home for the night.
I knew (and so did Mona) that I was going to spend a good chunk of Sunday studying for 2 tests in my anatomy class, which was going to blow Sunday. That basically shot my weekend in the ass. Shit.
So Mona went to bed around 8 or 9 as usual. I stayed up till 11 or so. Then around 3 or 4 I hear her calling me. She’s in the bathroom throwing up. There was nothing I could do, but she claims she feels better with me in there. Crazy, I know. So there I am, standing behind her, turning on the exhaust fan and handing her the occasional Kleenex.
By morning it’s apparent that she’s sick. So I’m in charge again. She stayed in bed until 11. Her mom was supposed to come over in the morning and take The Peanut overnight. The next day was Presidents Day and the daycare was closed for a Teacher Development Day. Mom agreed to keep The Peanut on Monday so that both of us could go to work.
Morning turned out to be 2 in the afternoon. By this time I was getting pretty frustrated. I really needed to get some study time in. My plan had been to leave in the morning and head somewhere quiet. With Mona out of action there was no way I could study and leave The Peanut to her own devices. So now most of the day was shot in the ass.
Mom was 30 minutes overdue (not counting the 2 or 3 hours that had passed since “morning”) and I couldn’t find the phone with the caller ID to call and ask “WTF?” Mona, you see, is incapable of putting any object a) back where she found it or b) in the same place twice. And since she was sick she wasn’t getting up to join in the search. I was so pissed that I couldn’t find the “page” button on the base to get the phone beeping. I about lost it at that point. The missing phone was the last straw. Mom showed up just as I located the phone and all I could do was glower and grumble. Mom noticed I was pissed (not like it wasn’t obvious) and was offended. She was sure it was all about her. I didn’t care. After she left I told Mona why I was pissed (somewhat harshly) and went to Borders to study. But I was so pissed I knew that wasn’t going to happen so I just browsed for half an hour.
By then the guilt had set in and I went home and apologized. After a nice long talk I headed out again. This time I ended up at a nearby Caribou Coffee. I went there because they were the only coffee house I could find that sold Diet Coke. I don’t drink coffee. There were several people in there studying or staring intently at their laptops. I figured I’d be able to work with little distraction, but was soon proven wrong. Just as I got my self organized it seemed like quite time was over. More people came in, some to meet with the studiers, and began to have quite conversations AT THE TOP OF THEIR LUNGS.
So I packed up my stuff and went next door to Au Bon Pain. I spent about an hour and a half to two hours there when Mona called asking about dinner. So I packed my stuff and went to the grocery store (I had asked her to email me a shopping list).
Later that night I started to get sick. I worked a half day on Monday then went home, took a nap and went to school. I did fine on the first test as near as I can guess. Tuesday I pretty much just phoned in and the rest of the week wasn’t too much different. Wednesday was the low point, but I made it to school for that evenings test and again, think I did OK.
I guess I started to feel better by yesterday. The Peanut seems to have recovered and so does Mona. My mother-in-law was so sick by Tuesday that she told Mona at one point she considered calling an Ambulance. She didn’t, and her physician has given her an official diagnosis of the flu, so she’s been off work most of the week.
There’s still lots more drama, but that’s the gist of things.
How’ve you been?
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Bar Stool Economics
Someone sent me this recently and it makes perfect sense to me. It was attributed to David R. Kamerschen, Ph.D. Professor of Economics, University of Georgia, but I can’t confirm that.
Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this:
The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay $1.
The sixth would pay $3.
The seventh would pay $7.
The eighth would pay $12.
The ninth would pay $18
.The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.
So, that's what they decided to do.
The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a curve. He said, 'Since you are all such good customers, I'm going to reduce the cost of your daily beer by $20. Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.'
The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes, so the first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free.
But what about the other six men -- the paying customers?How could they divide the $20 windfall so that everyone would get his 'fair share'?
They realized that $20 divided by six is $3.33.
But if they subtracted that from everybody's share, then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer.
So the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man's bill by roughly the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each should pay!
And so:
The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).
The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33%savings).
The seventh now paid $5 instead of $7 (28%savings).
The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings).
The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).
Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to drink for free.
But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their savings.
'I only got a dollar out of the $20,' declared the sixth man. He pointed to the tenth man, 'but he got $10!'
'Yeah, that's right,' exclaimed the fifth man. 'I only saved a dollar, too. It's unfair that he got ten times more than I!'
'That's true!!'shouted the seventh man. 'Why should he get $10 back when I got only $2? The wealthy get all the breaks!'
'Wait a minute,' yelled the first four men in unison. 'We didn't get anything at all. The system exploits the poor!'
The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.
The next night the tenth man didn't show up for drinks, so the nine sat down and had beers without him.
But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important.
They didn't have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!
And that, boys and girls, journalists and college professors, is how our tax system works. The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show up any more. In fact, they might start drinking overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.
So there you go. That’s why the biggest tax breaks always go to the richest 1%. What I don’t get is why don’t millions of registered voters understand this?
Lord I miss Ronald Reagan.
Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this:
The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay $1.
The sixth would pay $3.
The seventh would pay $7.
The eighth would pay $12.
The ninth would pay $18
.The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.
So, that's what they decided to do.
The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a curve. He said, 'Since you are all such good customers, I'm going to reduce the cost of your daily beer by $20. Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.'
The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes, so the first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free.
But what about the other six men -- the paying customers?How could they divide the $20 windfall so that everyone would get his 'fair share'?
They realized that $20 divided by six is $3.33.
But if they subtracted that from everybody's share, then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer.
So the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man's bill by roughly the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each should pay!
And so:
The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).
The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33%savings).
The seventh now paid $5 instead of $7 (28%savings).
The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings).
The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).
Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to drink for free.
But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their savings.
'I only got a dollar out of the $20,' declared the sixth man. He pointed to the tenth man, 'but he got $10!'
'Yeah, that's right,' exclaimed the fifth man. 'I only saved a dollar, too. It's unfair that he got ten times more than I!'
'That's true!!'shouted the seventh man. 'Why should he get $10 back when I got only $2? The wealthy get all the breaks!'
'Wait a minute,' yelled the first four men in unison. 'We didn't get anything at all. The system exploits the poor!'
The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.
The next night the tenth man didn't show up for drinks, so the nine sat down and had beers without him.
But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important.
They didn't have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!
And that, boys and girls, journalists and college professors, is how our tax system works. The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show up any more. In fact, they might start drinking overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.
So there you go. That’s why the biggest tax breaks always go to the richest 1%. What I don’t get is why don’t millions of registered voters understand this?
Lord I miss Ronald Reagan.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Hidden treasure
I love old houses and cool architecture. It kills me to see all the old, once gorgeous homes in Detroit that have been neglected, abandoned or burnt to ashes.
My wife and I used to drive around to some of the really cool neighborhoods and look at places that we'd love to live in, provided we had a good alarm system, a pit bull and plenty of ammo.
Every now and then I see a place that really gets my attention, as happened last week. To see what I found, click on the link to Google Maps and enter the intersection I have listed below. Then go to street view and take a good look.
http://maps.google.com
Grand River Ave & Rosa Parks Blvd, Detroit, MI 48208
Is that place cool or what?
Here's my question. There’s no business signage anywhere. What is that place? Is it still a home?
My wife and I used to drive around to some of the really cool neighborhoods and look at places that we'd love to live in, provided we had a good alarm system, a pit bull and plenty of ammo.
Every now and then I see a place that really gets my attention, as happened last week. To see what I found, click on the link to Google Maps and enter the intersection I have listed below. Then go to street view and take a good look.
http://maps.google.com
Grand River Ave & Rosa Parks Blvd, Detroit, MI 48208
Is that place cool or what?
Here's my question. There’s no business signage anywhere. What is that place? Is it still a home?
Don't have gun, will travel.
This is going to be a short one, I’ve been pretty busy lately.
Anyway, as you may or may not know I took a lateral demotion at work just before the end of the year. I know that doesn’t make much sense, but I’ll explain.
I was selling to Fortune 500 accounts originally. Auto companies, conglomerates, defense contractors, technology companies, what have you. If they’re listed on the Dow or NASDAQ chances are I would have called on them. Anyway, I struggled with that position. Mostly because I was coasting last year, figuring that I would be quitting in April of this year to return to school.
The company decided that since I wasn’t doing so well in the corporate area that they would allow me to move over to accounts from the fortune 1000 on down to small businesses. So that’s where I am now. Other than a change in title and account base, nothing has changed for me. I have the same base salary and commission structure and a lower quota. Last week I told Mona that this is the best my morale has been in a while. I’m pretty happy in this job, at least for now.
Now on to the story.
When I moved into the new spot, I was assigned a new territory by zip codes. Among a few other areas I was given the entire city of Detroit. Even though it’s slowly crumbling, there is still a lot of business being done, even outside of Downtown. And outside of Downtown is where the job took me last week.
I had called a guy looking for business the week before and since I was in the area I decided to stop in and talk with him. He’s sort of in the recycling business. I don’t want to say much more than that, but he at one time used to pay cash for the recyclables that people brought to him. The sign on the building now says they pay with Checks Only, No Cash.
So I rang the bell and the owner’s son let me in. He took me into a dingy office and we sat down by the desk to talk. Can you guess what I saw when I looked into the foot well of the desk? Yep. A pistol grip shot gun clipped there, in case of emergency. When I mentioned it, the son was pretty casual about it and then pointed out the pistol under his shirt as well. Hmph. Well.
Apparently the owner got shot about a year ago. That’s when they stopped paying cash for goods. He was shot in the belly, which I’m told was “lucky”, since it missed his heart and spine. Grrrreat.
So we got down to business, talked for a while, and then I was escorted out. The armed customer stood in the door and kept an eye on me until I was in the car.
Later, I called my boss and told him that if my customers were going to have guns then I wanted one too. So far he isn’t budging.
And that’s my new job. I go into one of the most dangerous cities in the developed world in a small car, wearing a suit and tie and try and sell things to people who at any minute may find themselves in the middle of an honest to God firefight.
Outside of the whole potential gunfight thing, I actually really like what I’m doing and the kinds of customers I now have. A guy who can decide whether or not he needs to shoot someone is not a person who dithers about making a buying decision, whereas someone in a mega-corporation usually looks for a way to not do anything that may draw attention to him or her self.
Strange, the things which make me happy.
What about you? What about your work do you enjoy that might seem a bit odd?
Anyway, as you may or may not know I took a lateral demotion at work just before the end of the year. I know that doesn’t make much sense, but I’ll explain.
I was selling to Fortune 500 accounts originally. Auto companies, conglomerates, defense contractors, technology companies, what have you. If they’re listed on the Dow or NASDAQ chances are I would have called on them. Anyway, I struggled with that position. Mostly because I was coasting last year, figuring that I would be quitting in April of this year to return to school.
The company decided that since I wasn’t doing so well in the corporate area that they would allow me to move over to accounts from the fortune 1000 on down to small businesses. So that’s where I am now. Other than a change in title and account base, nothing has changed for me. I have the same base salary and commission structure and a lower quota. Last week I told Mona that this is the best my morale has been in a while. I’m pretty happy in this job, at least for now.
Now on to the story.
When I moved into the new spot, I was assigned a new territory by zip codes. Among a few other areas I was given the entire city of Detroit. Even though it’s slowly crumbling, there is still a lot of business being done, even outside of Downtown. And outside of Downtown is where the job took me last week.
I had called a guy looking for business the week before and since I was in the area I decided to stop in and talk with him. He’s sort of in the recycling business. I don’t want to say much more than that, but he at one time used to pay cash for the recyclables that people brought to him. The sign on the building now says they pay with Checks Only, No Cash.
So I rang the bell and the owner’s son let me in. He took me into a dingy office and we sat down by the desk to talk. Can you guess what I saw when I looked into the foot well of the desk? Yep. A pistol grip shot gun clipped there, in case of emergency. When I mentioned it, the son was pretty casual about it and then pointed out the pistol under his shirt as well. Hmph. Well.
Apparently the owner got shot about a year ago. That’s when they stopped paying cash for goods. He was shot in the belly, which I’m told was “lucky”, since it missed his heart and spine. Grrrreat.
So we got down to business, talked for a while, and then I was escorted out. The armed customer stood in the door and kept an eye on me until I was in the car.
Later, I called my boss and told him that if my customers were going to have guns then I wanted one too. So far he isn’t budging.
And that’s my new job. I go into one of the most dangerous cities in the developed world in a small car, wearing a suit and tie and try and sell things to people who at any minute may find themselves in the middle of an honest to God firefight.
Outside of the whole potential gunfight thing, I actually really like what I’m doing and the kinds of customers I now have. A guy who can decide whether or not he needs to shoot someone is not a person who dithers about making a buying decision, whereas someone in a mega-corporation usually looks for a way to not do anything that may draw attention to him or her self.
Strange, the things which make me happy.
What about you? What about your work do you enjoy that might seem a bit odd?
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