My Story

Over at The West Virginia Surf Report today, Jeff talked about how he met his wife at work and thought that it seemed like it was a pretty common way for spouses to meet. Then he asked people for their stories.

Here's what I said-

I’d never found fishing off the company pier effective.

Nope. I met Mona on eHarmony. She and I work in the same office now, but I don’t it counts.

My brother met his wife (plastic surgeon) on eHarmony and now that rat bastard is loaded.

3 of his buddies met their wives on eHarmony. And 2 of those guys… woof.

One of Mona’s cousins met her husband on eHarmony.

One of Mona’s close friends met his wife on eHarmony.

I’m telling you, that stuff works. I want to get all 16 of us together and shoot an eHarmony commercial.

Here’s a story that was written about us in a local paper. It’s reprinted here without permission and if it turns out to be an issue I’ll remove it with apologies. Names have been changed because it seems like the sane thing to do.

Mona framed the original article for me on my birthday this year. It was written in 2005.

***

DETROIT - Talk about life-changing decisions.
A year and a half ago, Jorge and Mona Lipschutz were both Detroit singles trying to figure out where to find a quality date.

Then they posted profiles on the same Internet dating site, met a few weeks later and got married a little more than a year after that.

Now, they're sitting in their Dearborn, Mich., home on a Friday evening trying to keep Hannah, their black Labrador puppy, from gnawing everything in sight.

Jorge, 35, and Mona, 29, look so cute and natural as a couple that they ought to be in one of those commercials for Internet dating sites.

They provide a pleasant contrast to the ABC show "Hooking Up" (9 p.m. Thursdays) where singles juggle, mislead, evade and dump potential mates they meet online.

The biggest drama in the Lipschutzs' lives involves deciding who has to clean up after Hannah. The Internet actually seems to have worked for Jorge and Mona.

"I'm still shocked she would have anything to do with me," says Jorge, who acts and looks a bit like the George Costanza character from "Seinfeld."

"C'mon, she's out of my league," he says, looking at his wife.

Mona, a shy redhead, shoots a "please shut up" look his way.

"That's a compliment," Jorge tries to explain.

"Thanks," she replies.

A few years ago, Jorge and Mona's relationship might never have happened. Initially labeled a last resort for losers, Internet dating has gone mainstream.

As the TV show "Hooking Up" reveals, the Internet is far from a magic answer for singles. In the first episode, Cynthia, a 34-year-old hair-salon manager, meets a guy online who describes himself as a "slim Fabio." In person, he looks more like a burned-out hippie.

The dating sites, though, say Internet dating has paid off for thousands of singles. Dating site eHarmony knows of at least 12,000 couples married after meeting on its site.

Match.com estimates it has helped hundreds of thousands of singles meet. It receives 200 e-mails or letters each month from couples telling about their engagements or marriages.

The age of online daters ranges from teens to seniors, but both eHarmony and Match.com say the prime audience tends to be people in their 30s who have moved beyond their college social network and are still looking for a mate.

More than 26 million people, or 16 percent of U.S. Internet users, visited an online dating site in June, according to comScore, a Virginia-based research firm.

The traffic has leveled off from an initial boom two years ago, but comScore estimates that U.S. consumers spent $470 million last year on Internet personals, making it the largest category of paid online content.

For Mona and Jorge Lipschutz, the Internet provided a better way to meet potential dates. Before going online, Jorge, a corporate rep for A large compay, and Mona, a landscape designer, say their dating lives weren't going well.

"It kind of sucked," Mona says bluntly. "It was frustrating. I was going out with different guys. I'd go out with them a couple of times here and there. I wasn't really clicking with any one."

In late 2003, Mona registered for eHarmony. A friend who met someone online encouraged her to sign up.

About the same time, Jorge saw a TV ad for the site and registered, too. Within a couple of weeks, their profiles were matched.

They met for lunch. Sparks didn't fly at first.

"I thought she was cute," Jorge says.

"I enjoyed the lunch," Mona says.

They agreed on a second date, which happened to be Valentine's Day. Jorge brought an unusual gift - flowers and drill bits.

In one of their early conversations, Mona told him that she received a drill as a Christmas gift but couldn't use it because it didn't come with drill bits.

The drill bits were funny and touching, Mona says. "I knew he was listening to what I was saying," she says.

The more time they spent together, the more they felt they were a match.

On the surface, they have differences. Jorge is conservative. He voted for Jorge W. Bush. Mona is liberal. She voted for John Kerry. Jorge is a scuba instructor. Mona rarely gets in the water.

But at the core, they have a lot in common. They both have independent personalities and enjoy traveling to new places. They prefer entertaining at home rather than going out to bars or clubs.

"For us, it's been very comfortable," Jorge says. "The word we use more than any other is 'easy."'

In September, right before an East Coast trip together, Jorge proposed. They were married in March. Marriage has made their lives better, they say.

"I have someone to share my day with," Jorge says.

"Share your life with, really," Mona adds.

Without the Internet, they say they never would have met. They frequently encourage single friends and family to register online.

Their advice about Internet dating: Sign up, fill out the profile honestly and take the time to thoughtfully consider your matches.

Internet dating isn't an act of desperation, Jorge says. It's a realization that you might not randomly stumble across your future husband or wife.

"For 34½ years, Ms. Right had not fallen out of the sky and landed in my lap," he says. "Maybe, waiting for it wasn't the right thing."