My Brain Is So Big That My Neck Can Barely Hold My Head Up

I am a genius.

Here’s why.

Today was my last day of school for five weeks. All my finals are taken, papers written and evaluations performed.

This semester I (and the rest of my class) carried 21 credit hours. The first two weeks were devoted to a single two credit course that was basically preparatory. After that we had ten weeks and 19 credit hours. 5 of those credit hours were for time spent in the hospital working with patients. The other 14 credit hours were didactic classes.

In the first clinical rotation we did two eight hour shifts per week on a medical floor at an area hospital. We worked with a patient or two and did basic stuff that I’ve already written about. My clinical instructor thought I was the cat’s PJ’s. My evaluation was really good from her and she told me that I should spend a little time doing patient care before I moved on to bigger and better. The implication was that I would most certainly be moving on to bigger and better. My written and clinical grade was 3.989 out of 4.0.

My classmates knew the instructor liked me, but since she didn’t dislike any of them there weren’t any issues with favoritism or jealousy. The instructor told us as a group that we were pretty strong, and I think the lowest grade anyone got was a 3.5.

I figured my grade was due at least a little to the fact that I was well liked, so I figured that the next rotation would sort of round things out.

Tonight I finished my psych rotation (again, two eight hour shifts per week) and got another evaluation from a different clinical instructor. She told me I got the top grade in our class, 3.875 out of 4.0. She marked me down in one category, but only because she felt that no one at this level of education or experience could possibly get a perfect score in that category. But she felt that I was very strong and plans to ask the program chair to round my grade up a little. Ultimately it won’t matter, but it’s nice to hear.

The thing that really gets me is that this instructor hasn’t shown any hints of liking anyone more than anyone else. She also says that we are a very strong group in general. My written work seems to be a little better than most because, in her opinion, I listened to her requirements and instructions and delivered what she asked for. This was not the case with some of my classmates, although they did well enough.

So that’s twice now that I’m on the top of the pile. So maybe the hype is true after all.

Here’s what I think my final grades will be:

Clinicals: A
Clinical lecture: A
Assessment: A
Intro to Nursing: A
Pathophysiology: A-
Pharmacology Low A- or High B+

85% of the Pharm grade is in, and my score is 90.7%. 91% is an A-. The final 15% is participation. I never missed a class, so hopefully that will get me that last .3%

The real upside of this is really about whether or not I want to do graduate or doctoral work. For example, if I wanted to be a nurse anesthetist (and I don’t really), I would probably need a 3.8 GPA to get into most programs.

Other programs, like Masters of Nursing or Advanced Practice Nursing probably want 3.5 or better. They also take into account whether you went into an accelerated program like the one I'm in. Apparently high grades in an accelerated program look pretty good to admissions people. They figure if you can hack it here you can deal with graduate or post graduate work.

It looks like the Nurse Practitioner degree is going to go away over the next few years. There seems to be a trend to replace it with a Doctor of Nursing Practice degree. It’s really similar but from what I understand also adds in some more about the business side of running a practice.

Someone also recently told me that the degree is done quite heavily on line, since it’s really about theory mostly. People are able to work while they’re in class. And since it’s about nursing practice there’s no thesis or research needed to have the degree awarded.

The upside socially is for these DNP’s to take up some of the slack for physicians. And it looks like we’re headed for a shortage of them too. The personal upside is Nurse Practitioners and DNPs have low six figure incomes. That’s highly appealing.

The downside is that it’s confusing for patients. “You’re Doctor Nurse?” It also upsets physicians, who see DNPs as competition for patients. I understand that, and in their shoes I might be concerned too.

As far as the title goes, I think if I did it I’d only let people call me Doctor once per day. After that it’s Jorge. Or maybe Doc.

In the short term I need to find a job and pay off student loans for tuition at a private college. Hopefully I can find an employer who has a tuition forgiveness program (that's becoming more common in some places where nurses are in demand).

But I digress. The point is that my grades are excellent. More than one critical source has now rated me Awesome. External validation rocks.

I am a genius.